| From: | Doctor Doom <JCH8169@*****.TAMU.EDU> |
|---|---|
| Subject: | Adding Insanity to Insult and Injury... |
| Date: | Tue, 12 Oct 1993 12:59:24 -0500 |
(Hmmmmm...does this count for being in vain?)
]Nay, as has been stated previously, you are many things my friend, but innocent
]is not among them.
>Hey!! I only have +28 to my target number from defaulting from bike. I can
>make it, with two dice!! Really, I can.
]>You're way to carp-happy, Doomie ol' boy.
]Force 1000 Void Elementals are carp worthy...without question.
>I wasn't referring to that. However, if you will look carefully at the
>sentence by me, you will notice that I make use of the Old English "to"
meaning
>"much less than expected considering the circumstances" rather than the
Modern
>English "too" meaning "excessive."
That hearkens unto the usage of the Royal "we", which of course means
"you". *
* generally used in terms of exactly WHO shall be paying taxes, called
upon to make sacrifices, et cetera...
]Nay, 'tisn't personal, and should not be interpreted as such.
>Shame you didn't let anyone else know. . .
See below...
]>I sense an Occidental vs. Oriental debate evolving...definitely to be handled
]>off-list.
>Great taste!!!!
Nay, 'tis LESS FILLING!!!
]Thine handle in vain? Mere mention of an individual qualifies not as to take
]said handle in vain. Further, recall that you are a "god in your own mind" not
]mine.
>However, attribution of certain past acts involving the aforestated party
>without this party's previous knowledge as to intent _does_ qualify. Besides,
>how do you _know_ I'm not ghod in your mind?
By merit of the simple fact that *I* am, of course.
]>repartee, which it was until, you got ticked, Doomie.
]Ticked? Nay...partaking in and enjoying non-serious pseudo-intellectual
]repartee, not personal insult-swapping. This qualifies not e'en as a Flame
]War, perhaps exchange...skirmish?
>No, no, no. You see, here we have a classic case of editing gliches. Note the
>comma after the "until?" That means that there was a whole thought
>accidentally removed by the editor. Really, there was. ;)
Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure, I believe you...really I do...
[ No...no...you STILL have not succeeded in looking innocent. Perhaps
you should try defaulting from another skill, perhaps Underwater
Basket-Weaving? ]
][This Flame Skirmish was brought to you by the Craftmatic Tendon-Puller...]
>It slices! It dices! It circumcises!! (Just a little off the top, please.)
Perhaps you'd like to select from our wide variety of other popular products:
The Clorox Colada
The Steel-Bristled Retina Brush
The Gauze Parachute (the perfect gift for in-laws)
The Ronco In-The-Skull Brain Scrambler
AND...
The Popeil Pocket-Sized Suicide Machine!
]This is also due to my recent requisitioning a new, updated version of Sense of
]Humor software, which I am presently beta-testing. Considering the degree of
]mis-interpretation, perhaps I should return it to the manufacturer, with notes
]as to is varying effectiveness.
>Some amount of foresight could perhaps allow sufficient warning to be issued
>that the rest of us could understand the debugging process at hand, rather than
>believe that we receive the finished product. :)
I conjectured the degree of levity infused within my script (concentration of
1000 ppm) was sufficient for others to discern my intent. Upon reflection,
however, the possibility exists that my sarcasm circuitry is not functioning
within accepted parameters...
Mr. LaForge, set the technical jargon buffers into motion, and run a Level 1
Diagnostic on [insert esoteric, arcane name of a subsystem coupled with various
nonsensical procedural information here] and call a Staff Meeting such that we
may attempt some fairly shallow character development merely by demonstrating
our difference of opinions in the face of this crisis.
-----
Siskel: "Personally, I think he was trying to say too much in that scene..."
Ebert: "Gene, I don't think that you're giving them enough credit."
Siskel: "Roge, it's been said before!"
Ebert: "I give him points for at least trying...he's trying to reach new
heights here, to attain greater expression--"
Siskel: "And it's been said better."
Ebert: "You always put too much emphasis on Scorsese's work." (spelling?)
Siskel: "Do not."
Ebert: "Do too."
Siskel: "Do not!"
Ebert: "Do too!"
-----
]"We have secretly replaced the coffee normally served at this restaurant with
] sand and ground-up clam shells. Let's see if they can tell the difference..."
>Great, salty aftertaste, with just a _hint_ of fish. I give it two pseudopods
>up.
For those of you tired of Vaseline petroleum jelly...
Now there's Vaseline Petroleum Jam, for that nice SLICK feeling to make those
bagels go down that much faster!
This insanity was brought to you by Doctor Doom.
_ Additional funding was provided by:
/ \
/ \
/ ---\\ Doom Technologies & Weapon Systems
/ <(O)> \ Dark Thought Publications
/ \ The Prussian Army
/ \ The Spanish Inquisition (weren't expecting them, eh?)
/ \ The Ancient Order of the Bavarian Illuminati
=============== (the world's oldest conspiracy...join today!)
^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^
"I did not do it; I have PICTURES of me NOT doing it."
