| From: | Doctor Doom <jch8169@*******.TAMU.EDU> |
|---|---|
| Subject: | The Reports of My Demise ... |
| Date: | Tue, 25 Oct 1994 16:31:19 -0500 |
Madness did verily strike one to be the call of the day as I
perused the recent logs ... to what enigmatic missive did all of these
speculative statements as to my supposed replacement, identity as J.
Edgar Hoover, and dubious fashion sense owe their ultimate genesis?
Fraught with curiosity, I set to plying through the sundry communiques.
Eventually the instigation was localized to a solitary post ...
specifically, an unauthorized THWAP launched from mine account and with
some measure of the appropriate accouterments, save that of language.
In such a grievous affront to the personage of Doom there can be
but ONE conceivable culprit: Mister Mood, an entity with which I have
experienced innumerable clashes in the far-flung past.
Mr. Mood is only superficially versed in the myriad manifestations
and infinite intricacies which combine to form, conspire in concert, and
compose the admittedly markedly idiosyncratic language of Doomspeak, as
was readily apparent to astute observers of his abortive attempt at the
emulation of my archaic lexiphanicistic manner of verbal conveyance. My
antithesis he is in a host of respects ... yet there are undeniable
similarities betwixt he and me.
I mark your incredulity at this juncture ... jawohl, the delineation
doth ring quite fantastic, e'en to me were I not otherwise apprised of
the situation. 'Ware his presence, meine Kameraden! His motus operandi
deceitful and insidious, his demeanor ranging from the shockingly prosaic
to vulgar vernacular, yet his designs remain a mystery, assuming his
woefully pedestrian mind is capable of machinations transcending vexation
and trickery. Ne'ertheless, his snares are legion ...
"Yo Dudes! Like, you didn't like my post?"
Halt, interloper! I woulde speak with thee, for thou hast defiled mine
account with thy monosyllabic prattling!
Forgive my haste, meine Kameraden, but I am beset by the desire to thrash
a particularly exasperating doppelgaenger who is presently seeking egress
from the laboratory with conspicuous rapidity.
Colonel Count von Hohenzollern und von Doom, DMSc, DSc, PhD.
Doom Technologies & Weapon Systems -- Dark Thought Publications
>>> Working on solutions best left in the dark.
<<<
[ Doctor Doom : jch8169@*******.tamu.edu ]
^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^
"In terms of impact, the gulf between the correct way to express an idea and
the almost correct method of conveyance is not dissimilar to the disparity
betwixt shooting a bullet and throwing it."
-- Doctor Doom
