| From: | Pete Sims <petesims@********.demon.co.uk> |
|---|---|
| Subject: | Re: Dwarf stupid questions...:) |
| Date: | Sat, 28 Sep 1996 17:32:51 +0100 |
<gurth@******.nl> writes
>Here's what I dug up from my ShadowRN File O' Wonders:
>
>------------------
>
>Date: Thu, 7 Mar 1996 13:37:37 -0600 (CST)
>From: Sakura <jeffj@**.com>
>To: shadowrn@********.itribe.net
>Subject: Re: more ranting
>Reply-To: shadowrn@********.itribe.net
>
>On Thu, 7 Mar 1996, Terry Amburgey wrote:
>> >Arthur Vogel (Democrat/One World Party): A Dwarf lawyer from Ontario.
>> >Vogel has made a career of defending ecological causes in court and is
>> >supposed to be a killer negotiator. His running mate, Gary Grey, is a Troll
>> >Eagle shaman. Needless to say, the Vogel/Grey ticket is considered one of
>> >the most "metahuman friendly" (along with the Big D).
>>
>> Vogel and Grey are stooges for Tir Taingire immortal elves.
>
>No way! Vogel is an immortal *dwarf*! ;)
>And now, from the home office in beautiful Pittsburgh, PA, we present:
>
Not stooges, they have their own agenda, but with the elven vote as a
powerful backing, it stands to reason they would be sympathetic to the
elven problems.
>TOP 10 REASONS DWARVES ARE BETTER THAN ELVES
>
>10.The dwarves didn't cobble together a culture and language out of bits
> of Celtic Myth and Tolkien, and then try to pass it off as 'traditionally
> Dwarvish'
Questionable, we've just never heard them talking dwarven, doesn't mean
they don't, maybe they're remembering their previous secretiveness.
>9. You never see a dwarf walking around with that Elven curled-lip
> sneer...you know, the one that makes 'em look constipated?
Of course not, 1) he hasn't got that quivery lip to manage the
expression, 2) the beard hides most of it :-)
>8. You never see a dwarf walking around with the goofy elven "I love
> mousse' hairdo, either.
Have you ever tried to add mousse, and style a brillo pad, when you're
hair resembles 10 gauge wire, there's not much you *can* do with it.
>7. Dwarven mages rule. Who needs a bonus to Charisma when you have a
> bonus to -Willpower-?
If you're not going to play with spirits on a regular basis, fine, after
all, it's one thing being a fancy git, like the elves, it's another
standing there taking the worst the pointy eared fruitcakes can throw at
you, and returning the favour. :-)
>6. Dwarves can outcuss, outdrink and outfight those candy-ass treehuggers
> any day.
Born from the earth and rock, dwarves have the constituion of a rock.
Elves are too high strung, did you know that most of the ruling
fraternity have the most horrendous ulcers, they just can't take the
stress you know :-)
>5. The immortal dwarves aren't dumb enough to let their presence be known
> on the biggest underground BBS in existence.
??? Funny, I seem to remember a few classic cock ups from the IE's. To
their detriment if I recall correctly.
>4. Dwarves don't get people in goofy costumes walking up to them and
> saying 'Live long and prosper."
Or nutters in plate mail, carrying huge axes and clanking around scaring
the natives and wildlife.
>3. Harlequin's an elf. 'nuff said.
>2. Read your Tolkien. Dwarves get cooler songs. ("Far o'er the misty
> mountains cold" vs. "Tra-la-la-lally". If anyone brings up that
"Hi-ho"
> song, I'll perforate them.)
Hiho Hiho, it's off to work..... ooooopps
>1. Dwarves are the only subrace with the ability to grow _real_ facial
> hair. (With the exception of the guys from ZZ Top.)
That's not *real* facial hair, it's a form of abrasive for tunnelling.
>
TTYL
Pete
--
Pete Sims
Heroes or Fools? That's a determination others will make in hindsight. But by
being here now, we make that determination for ourselves, and it's neither.
Lt.Col.T.C.McQueen
