| From: | Freddy Frypp <JAMES-CUENO@*********.EDU> |
|---|---|
| Subject: | Checkpoint Popcorn |
| Date: | Wed, 21 Dec 1994 10:36:03 CST |
been along to watch the boys (and girl) in action.
Christ, I'm gettin' all sappy and sentimental. Somebody slap me.
Slap me again... harder... harder, oh I've been so bad!
Sorry, about that, flashback or something....
Anyway, Chris downloaded the camera footage, or re-routed it, or
somedamnthing. Hell, I'm not a computer wonk, I don't understand what
he did. If you want to know, ask him.
Roll the tape, dammit.
Waitaminnit, he could only get the interior shots so I'll need to get
you caught up.
OK, somewhere over in Oakland, Kabuki Man, uh, liberated a limo for
the strike team (I got no idea where he could have found a limo in
Oakland of all places, but... maybe I don't really want to know).
Nothing better to piss off the Japs than a limo full o' goblins. So
once Chris managed to hack his way into the checkpoint system (no
small feat, I was watching on a video monitor we plugged into he deck
he was using, one word: Wowza!) we called Scipio on the carphone to
get things rolling. GoD and Griff followed in another liberated car
far enough back to be inconspicuous, but close enough to add to the
mayhem.
So, just like we hoped, they rolled into one of the checkpoints on
the south side (really fraggin' dumb the way the japs have got it,
there's full-blown checkpoints on one street and nada on the next,
dumb, but it helped us) and holy-bureaucratic nightmares Batman, the
I-Marines asked if they could talk to the occupants of the car inside
the checkpoint.
Allright, Lady Die's the ork in spandex and leather (shudder),
Freemont's the troll and Scipio's the other ork, got it? I don't
think GoD and Griffyn made the film, sorry guys.
OK, now roll the gaddamned video.
+++++BEGIN VIDEO DOWNLOAD
The camera is one of those wide angle jobs so you can see everything
in the room at once. This room of the small building that
makes up the checkpoint opens to the outside and has a couple of
desks with computer jockeys busily punching in data. One I-Marine
guards the door with an FN-HAR - looking gun slung over one shoulder.
Two orks and a troll come in with four more Marines following, Model
100 SMGs trained on them.
The video feed doesn't include audio, but if you've seen one
bureaucratic border patrol slob complaining about the condition of
someone's passes you can tell that some bureaucratic border patrol
slob is complaining about the condition of their passes. And if you
pay attention, every time you look at the goblins, their faces look
different. Seems like Griffyn had trouble sustaining the mask spells.
Can't blame him, he had to sustain three masks and a sensory spell to
follow them into the building.
Eventually, one of the orks says something and it really angers
the checkpoint commander who through up his arms and starts
screaming and waving. The Marines start to push the goblins
through a door between two desks into another room, when the troll
grabs one. The shock gloves he's wearing discharge and the Marine
jerks violently. With a powerful toss, the Marine flies across the
room and hits the commander full across the chest. Out of nowhere,
the female ork produces a pair of knives and proceeds to nail one of
the Marine's hands to the wall and bury the other into his throat.
Blood spurts onto her, the wall, the Marine and a huge puddle
begins to run onto the floor. The other ork slips a hand into his
coat and spins towards the camera drawing a pistol. A quick burst
explodes into the face of the third Marine covering them and he drops
to the floor in a heap. The troll puts a right cross into the last
Marine coverning them and then tackles the Marine so they land behind
one of the desks.
The Marine at the door drops his rifle into a firing position and
fires a few shots into the desks, catching the remaining datajockey.
Lady Die grabs the SMG from the Marine she killed and she and Scipio
begin to return fire. The Marine jumps out of the door, but his
pushed back in right after a bright flash erupts outside the
building. Flames start to edge into the room from outside as the
goblin faces stop changing and solidify. Another Marine runs into
the checkpoint building, firing his SMG wildly at targets outside.
As he enters the room, the video goes strange. The room melts and
reforms several times, but in odd places and with odd colors.
Mackerel begin to rain down on everyone. Bright lights flash. A
vintage stage coach drives through the room chased by bandits who
are chased by a herd of rapid hippopotami who are chased by cavalry
who are chased by lawyers who are in turn chased by marauding talk-
show hosts and their transvestite nun prostitute guests, hitting
nothing, but still appearing to fill the room. The goblins stay
crouched behind the desks, but on the wall, rather than the floor.
The room returns to normal as the new Marine starts to melt into a
puddle on the floor, mixing with the blood of the dead Marines.
The goblins charge out of the room, firing into the checkpoint
commander, who show signs of life.
Minutes later, the screen flashes bright white and the feed ends.
+++++ END VIDEO DOWNLOAD
I'm laughing so hard I think I wet myself. Way to go people. Way to
go.
You were right Griff, chaos spells are fun to watch. I hate to think
what it looked like outside.
Anyway, so everybody abandoned their vehicles, Griffyn turned
everybody invisible, another tough act, and they met up with Kabuki
Man in one of the Rovers who drove them back here. They've been
here for a grand total of about ten minutes, so this stuff is fresh.
They tell me Kabuki Man turned a sickly shade of white when the doors
on the Rover opened themsleves and the truck started shaking as
everybody piled in, invisibly. Woulda loved to have seen that.
You'll be glad to know our friends made it into town easily.
They're givin' you 10 grand a head for this, plus 5% of sales.]<<<<<
-- Freddy Frypp (11:40:12 / 12-21-55)
President
Frypp Security, Inc. (CFSM Uplink #5150)
